To ignore my mental health during this crisis would be foolish and to the detriment of my physical well-being. This blog has helped a lot with that as well as all the support I receive through friends, family, and colleagues. But now, as crises hopefully have come to an end and the numbness subsides, some psychotherapy might come in handy. So I’m seeing someone weekly for a while and pleased that it’s covered by my health insurance.
That was a funny call. In order to have it covered, you need to request it. They have a special number to call just for mental health and the first step is letting them know why you need it. You know when you call in sick for work and you want to make sure you sound as sick as you really feel, so you might cough more, or get more nasally, or sigh a lot, just sound sicker? I had that same feeling when I called the mental health hot line. I had to sound like I really needed this - I needed to sound crazy.
I think I stuttered more, paused a lot like I couldn’t think or form a sentence, and tried to sound frail. I didn’t rant or say anything crazy but I don’t think I had too as they bought it, hook, line, and sinker. They agreed - this guy needs help. One question did scare me though. Before they agreed I needed to be seen, I was asked if I was suicidal. What should I say? I’m not suicidal but could my therapy being covered hinge on the answer?
I was honest and said no which was fine since they covered me anyway. Maybe they were concerned I was going to do it right then while I was on the phone. Don’t you pre-mediate and plan those for a while? Would that really be in anyone’s plan? Maybe all my sound crazyisms added up to me sounding suicidal? Well, maybe it did. So I guess I did a good job at sounding as crazy as I feel.
Related posts:



So glad to hear this Ray. I think exploring one’s own narratives during times of difficulty is really important. Good for you!
Comment by Monica — 2008.10.24 @ 6:26 am
Please Ray don’t screw up the mental health thing. stay crazy but have boundaries no invites to concerts.
Comment by sondra — 2008.11.01 @ 1:43 pm